


...makes perfect

by silvercobwebs



Category: Cable and Deadpool, Deadpool (Comics)
Genre: Domestic, Families of Choice, Fluff, M/M, superfamily but not that one
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-12-07
Updated: 2012-12-07
Packaged: 2017-11-20 13:53:35
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,686
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/586075
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/silvercobwebs/pseuds/silvercobwebs
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Dae asked for domestic fluff and ridiculous cuteness between Wade, Nate and a little Hope. So, warning: fluff and cuteness between these three. Like, XXX hardcore fluff, yo.</p>
            </blockquote>





	...makes perfect

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Guardian](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Guardian/gifts).



> This is not your regularly scheduled AU Superfamily.

He’s trapped.

Inky blackness fills the room, and there’s a light so tantalisingly close, but he can’t move, practically can’t breathe thanks to this…monolith crushing him. It’s hot and dark and he just knows he’ll have to pee soon, and he’s utterly helpless. Oh ye gads, Wade thinks as he valiantly manages to wriggle a toe free, maybe he’ll be stuck here forever? Maybe he’ll just end up being some exhibit visited by futuristic aliens with those giant foreheads (‘cause you know they’ve got to have extra room for their futuristic big squishy brains) and space probes, and they’ll point and laugh at his predicament – The Human Kraft (don’t forget the TM!) Slice, The Flattened Man, the -

‘Wade,’ a low voice rumbles into his neck. ‘You’re narrating your dreams again.’ A quiet kiss is placed behind his ear, and he sighs, definitely not in pleasure no no, but because he’s…he’s tired and bored of being used as a mattress by Cable yet again, what with Nate’s heavy metal ass (heh – Heavy Metal ass. Gives a whole new meaning to 'Enter Sandman', don’t it?) being so, well, heavy, and not technically pressing into him, but still it’s part of the package, in a very literal sense.

‘Daydream, not dream-dream.’ Wade rolls his eyes. ‘Honestly, what kind of telepath are you supposed to be when you can’t tell the difference?’ He tries to adjust his position a little, so his right foot isn’t dangling off the bed in such a precarious fashion. It’s cold out there, after all, and he can’t see that well, what with his face being smushed into the pillow, and there could be frostbite. There so could!

Wade feels the smirk against his skin as Nathan lightly hooks his foot with one of his own and tucks it under one of the covers that had made their way halfway down the bed. ‘A pretty amazing one, considering your mind is mostly unreadable.’

Stupid Cable, always ruining stuff with facts.

‘Hmmph.’

Nate tips his head and neatly arranges a series of kisses from Wade’s ear to the juncture between neck and shoulder, and Wade would swear blind they’re all so perfectly aligned that if he continues there’d be a neat little Deadpool join-the-dots (fun for all kids from 8-80, but none of those bratty precocious seven year-olds thankyouverymuch.) puzzle freshly made each time.

‘Are you really that uncomfortable?’ Nate inquires, his weight shifting just the slightest, and Wade feels the whisper of winter air between them. He shivers and tugs Nate back down because, okay, maybe Nate is a lardass using him like some kind of ugly human shaped mattress with all the springs jutting out that you just can’t be bothered to tip into next door’s garden, but Nate also happens to make quite a decent human – mutant – whatever! blanket. So, he can stay, Wade supposes. For now. Because he really will need to pee soon.

Wade sighs as dramatically as he can into the pillow. ‘We-ell, I suppose I’ve endured worse tortures. Seriously though, have you smelt Wolverine’s breath? It’s like 90% proof!’ His eyes light up as a delightful thought takes hold. ‘I wanna light a match and see if I can turn him into a portable stabby flamethrower, but first I think I’m going to have to work out some kind of practical yet sexy asbestos couture…’

Nate nips lightly at his earlobe. ‘Mm.’

‘Guh. I mean, maybe something incorporating a garter…?’

‘Maybe later, Wade.’ and Nate starts doing some delightful things with his teeth, and suddenly Wade is so very very glad that Nate’s all stupid and enlightened future Jesus guy because most people won’t go within a mile of a dude when there’s a distinct possibility that if you nibble the wrong bit of skin you’re gonna get a pus facial, but then Nate really isn’t most people, now is he?

Wade sighs again, and this time he can’t be bothered to pretend it’s not in pure pleasure, turning his head and trying to peek over his shoulder to watch Nathan. ‘Kinda keen on a little audience participation here,’ he suggests as Nate rolls over, somehow still managing to hold on to him and finally bringing them face to face.

Nate smiles. It’s infectious.

‘You know, it’s still dark out,’ Nate begins, sliding a cool finger over a warm bicep.

Wade groans, and not in any kind of way that pleases either of them. ‘Well thanks a bunch, Mr. Family Sitcom Cliché Tropester! Know what this means? We’re due a completely inappropriate interruption right about now. Tiny kidlet appearing in 3, 2, 1…’ He glares at the bedroom door.

The door remains obligingly closed.

Nate arches an eyebrow and goddamnit, even his facial hair exudes smugness.

‘I was so sure,’ Wade frowns for a moment before shrugging. ‘Fuck it then,’ he grins before straddling Nate. ‘Fanartists please note I am totally the top in this scenario, and although not technically wearing pants I’m-‘

‘Merry Christmas!’ Hope exclaims with glee as she bounds into their room, covered in tinsel, whilst Wade promptly falls off the bed. Later he will of course insist that Nate pushed him. It’s so much more convenient to blame the telekinetic boyfriend.

Thankfully, Wade lands on the side of the bed furthest away from Hope, whose brow wrinkles in four perfect little lines. ‘Why are you wrestling?’

‘Knocking, Hope,’ Nathan swiftly reminds her. ‘We asked you to knock before you entered our room.’

_Our_ room, thinks Wade, slightly dizzy. He has a roomie. The best roomie. The best friend roomie he can have sex with. Why didn’t they do this fifty issues again already? And why are his pants on backwards? Oh yes – cute little girl. Staring. Awkwardness all round, well except for Hope, whose five year-old mind hasn’t processed the full context of this quite yet. Thank Thor for small mercies.

‘But – Christmas!’ Hope relies as if that should be answer enough.

Nathan’s brow wrinkles and for a moment the two share the same expression. It’s definitely not adorable, Wade notes. Absolutely not. ‘It’s November, Hope. Christmas is in December. We went through all the major holidays of this time together, remember?’

‘He’s got a point there, kiddo,’ Wade adds, making sure his fly is up before sliding across the bed to meet her. Previous falling-out an landing on his butt forgotten. Totally. Honest. ‘Unless we reeeeallly slept in.’ Hm, a month of sex and manly cuddles? That could be a thing. They’d just need a source of water and the local takeout place is speed dial #2 on his cell…

‘I know that,’ Hope shakes her head. Honestly, how silly are Nathan and Wade? They wrestle on the furniture and they don’t even know about dates! Arg! Boys. ‘I thought we could have Practice Christmas.’

‘Practice Christmas?’ Nathan’s frown wobbles.

Hope crawls onto Wade’s lap and speaks with all the authority that only a five-year old with an Idea can muster. ‘Yes. So we can practice first and get the real one just right.’

‘…Like a trial run?’ Something tugs at the corner of Nate’s mouth just a bit.

Hope beams, and suddenly Wade finds that his lap has turned into a trampoline. Damn, that kid has adorably pointy kneecaps.

‘That sounds kinda awesome, actually,’ he comments, gently setting her down on the floor as she pretends to glide and starts making reindeer noises. At least, that’s what he assumes, because, really, what does a reindeer sound like anyway? Do they bark? Honk? Now that might explain Rudolph, whose just got a real stinker of a cold… ‘We can get the biggest tree ever, and Nate’, he jabs him in the chest with a finger, ‘you can totally pimp it out with your mad Mary Poppins decorating skillz, and Bob can be and elf, and nog! There has to be egg nog, right? It sounds awful, but it’s not-Christmas, so we gotta try. For Science.’

‘Practice,’ Hope corrects as she pilots herself under the duvet covers.

Wade shrugs as Nathan carefully extracts the wriggling child before she discovers Wade’s Captain America thong lodged between the pillows. ‘Whatever. It’ll be great. It’s your first Christmas in the non-apocalypsey future, we can do whatever you want, and it is going to be super-duper uber-amazingness, baby girl. With sprinkles.’

‘Rainbow ones?’

‘Well duh.’ and suddenly Wade’s waist is momentarily clamped in an iron grip. He almost pulls away at the alien sensation, then remembers that Hope is Nate’s – their - kid – and freakishly awesome to the point of hugging – hugging! - him like some person who gets hugged on a regular basis.

‘I’m gonna find all the lights in the house,’ Hope declares as she runs to the door, eyes sparkling, ‘and then we can trim the tree.’ She nods firmly, then disappears, whilst Nathan stands there like some kind of gropable statue and does a very bad job of suppressing a smile.

Wade eyes Nathan up, cocking his head, and Nate can almost hear badly-oiled gears and wheels whirring into action. ‘You know,’ Wade begins as he circles his prey like a particularly festive shark. ‘You’re just about the right size for a tree, plus you’re sturdy and you’re all glowy on top, and I seriously want to climb you right now, so how ab-‘

A hand squeezes Wade’s shoulder in warning. Gently. ‘I thought you hated the holidays?’ Nate murmurs, their lips brushing. ‘"Too much goodwill to all men is bad for business", I believe is what you said.’

He watches the other man pause for a moment, extracting himself from his grip, and then Nathan is suddenly the recipient of the greatest Christmas present he can think of.

‘Well, I never had a _real_ family before now did I?,’ Wade says as he exits the room, following their daughter downstairs.

There is the instantly recognisable crash of a table lamp being dropped on the floor followed by laugher and then more crashes.

Oh yes, Nate wryly decides as he heads towards increasingly loud noises. It’s going to be the best Practice Christmas ever.

 

\- end


End file.
